D.A.R.E. to Sell Bongs

I remember D.A.R.E.  I don't know if you are of this age to remember this program, and the details are fuzzy to me, even now.  But it amounted to bringing police officers in to the schools to catch us before we were caught by the druggies and the dope peddlers.  And it worked on me, for sure.  I was a little Victorian.  No smoking!  No drinking!  That little feather that some girls were wearing in their hair???  Don't even think about it.  I was a very savvy fifth grader and I knew that the metal "clip" was really meant to hold drugs!!!!

So when I was in SOHO a couple of days and spotted these on the street...

Now this seems daring to me.  We know what these are for Mr. Vendor, man!!!!   These are not plant holders or decorative vases!!!

Summer's Eve...

It's a balmy summer evening in Brooklyn, just past eleven, and it seemed like a nice time to jot down some thoughts, so I washed the dishes, made myself a nightcap (oh yes I did) and put on summer music.  To me, summer music can be languid like the Flamingos doo-wop cover of I Only Have Eyes For You, or it could be anything by Astrud Gilberto, that music seems meant for summer, or even big band hits and toss in some Jeff Buckley.  Truth be told, I'm not sure what exactly defines summer music, but I know it when I hear it.

It's strange how malleable our emotions are, or does it speak to the power of music, that a certain song can come on and it makes me feel a very particular way?  I don't mean "that song that he and I listened to when we" fill in the blank.  I just mean the way certain songs can make you joyful or whimsical or melancholy.  Right now, I'm missing my friends... Mark, Meg, Julie... my folks, my little dog...and I know I'll see them again, but I sure do wish they could all be with me here now.  Of course, now I get to be with my friends Kirk and Heather, and Leslie, and Melissa and Kathleen, and I couldn't be more grateful.  Every decision has a trade off I suppose.  The trade I've made is so I can be close to opportunity and creativity, and the energy that this town has.

It's funny, but it doesn't feel at all like Los Angeles.  In LA I would hide what I did for a living.  I would never tell anyone that I was in a show or that I sang, or what have you.  And every time I heard someone talking about their new head shots my stomach would churn and Id become a caustically bitter bitch.  I guess, in LA, it was just so easy to say your were performer.  Anyone could get head shots and dream of fame and fortune or reality tv stardom.  But the theatre?  You ain't doing it for the money, that's for sure.  So if you are doing it, you must really love and be devoted to it.  At least that's the way it feels.  So when I hear someone talking about their auditions as I'm typing away on my computer at a coffee shop, or planning an indie music video, it feeds me.  Makes me feel a part of a community in a way that LA never did.

Another thing about New York.  I know an agent helps.  But it's not required that you have one to get into an auction.  I couldn't even get seen in LA.  Everything I got was because of who I knew, my friends who trusted me and knew that I would deliver something.  I was really grateful for those times, but of course it's nice to win a job from a stranger, and what they see right in front of them in the moment.

Tomorrow I'm seeing Charles Busch at 54 Below in his cabaret show That Boy/That Girl.  Admittedly, there was a moment when I thought I wouldn't go, as money is something I need to keep track of, but... Mr. Busch has written some amazing things in his lifetime.  Psycho Beach Party, Die Mommie Die!, Vampire Lesbians of Sodom, among others.  And his approach to drag is the kind I appreciate and understand.  Yes, it's about looking good, but there's something under the surface... he brings an intelligence to drag, a devotion to the great ladies, that really resonates, and he channels that spirit and glamour like no one else.  It's an incredible talent.  And when someone like that, someone I identify with and take inspiration from, is performing a cabaret show, it's a good moment to not only listen and enjoy, but to learn.  So I'll give you an update tomorrow or the next day for sure.

Somewhere That's Greene

No, the title doesn't refer to the recent Encores Revival of Little Shop that was by all accounts incredible.  Instead it refers to a town three and a half hours from the city.  They have an Equity theatre that is producing Jeff Daniels' comedy Escanaba in Da Moonlight about two brothers and their father on an annual deer hunting trip.  They are replacing a cast member, and conducted auditions to fill the role.

It was the first thing I submitted for in New York, through the Equity website, and I got an email from the Artistic director that I might be a match.  We set up an audition and I went to work.  I read the script, printed up the sides, made some notes, studied the Upper Peninsulan accent I would need to do the part (it shares some qualities with the Minnesotan accent, but is definitely distinct from it) and bright and early Sunday morning I did a couple readings from the sides.  I felt it was a really strong reading, but you never know.

Well last night I was told I'd booked the role, and as of this morning it's official!!  I'll be playing Reuben Soady, the elder son of the Soady family.  He's ever landed a buck, and if he doesn't do it this year, he will go down in the records as being the oldest one in family history to have never landed one.  It's a comedy very immersed in the UP culture, full of references to Pasties, home brew, drinking and hunting, and aliens.  Yep.

I leave on July 27th for six weeks in Greene.  I'll be living at the theatre with the rest of the cast, though I'll have a private room, access to a company car, and will have a day off each week.  It should be pretty exciting, and I should have plenty of time for other creative projects, so hopefully it will be conducive to writing.  Of course, as a human, I am completely against deer hunting, so it will be interesting to play a character that is so immersed in it, but we will see how it goes.  It's a story, after all.

I'll definitely send updates about how the show is progressing.  Right now Im just grateful to have found paying work so quickly that is in my chosen field, and affirms that there are good opportunities out here for actors and artists.  And Greene's high temps are typically in the seventies and eighties, so it will provide welcome relief from the heat.  Halleluj!!!

I Is Chef!

I've always had the vague feeling, not that I usually act on it quickly, that a place you live doesn't feel like home until you've broken in the kitchen by making a full out meal.  I'm not talking boxed soup, but some delicious recipe (it's best if it's one you've never tried).  Cooking in this kitchen was a joy, and a bit of an adventure, as the stove is compact, and I'm not very familiar with what utensils and spices are available, so in some cases I had to make do.  I found a really delicious chicken recipe I'd been dying to try (found it on Pinterest, that's right) and I was really pleased with the results.

(Picture for illustrative purposes only.  This is not my actual result)

The recipe originated from the Jewhungry blog, and the alterations I made were few.  I am not kosher so I went ahead and used butter an sour cream, although I'm sure it's delicious with the dairy substitutions, they weren't available within easy walking distance from my apartment.  I also used some rice noodles from the fridge (which I'll replace before my friends come home because I am a good person) as I didn't have a saucepan and tight fitting lid avail.  

All in all, it was truly "dish delish", made me feel like a grown up, and acclimated me to the kitchen with little trauma as it is a dish that's easy to prepare.  So  hooray for cooking!

The Third New York

"There are roughly three New Yorks.  There is, first, the New York of the man or woman who was born there, who takes the city for granted and accepts its size, its turbulence as natural and inevitable. Second, there is the New York of the commuter- the city that is devoured by locusts each day and spat out each night.  Third, there is New York of the person who was born somewhere else and came to New York in quest of something.  Of these trembling cities the greatest is the last- the city of the final destination, the city that is a goal.  It is this third city that accounts for New York's high strung disposition, its poetical deportment, its dedication to the arts, and its incomparable achievements.  Commuters give the city its tidal restlessness, natives give it solidity and continuity, but the settlers give it passion.  And whether it is a farmer arriving from a small town in Mississippi to escape the indignity of being observed by her neighbors, or a boy arriving from the Corn Belt with a manuscript in his suitcase and a pain in his heart, it makes no difference:  Each embraces New York with the intense excitement of first love, each absorbs New York with the fresh yes of an adventurer, each generates heat and light to dwarf the Consolidated Edison Company."  

-- E.B White from a passage in his essay Here is New York.

There's an App For That

Thank God for technology.  It's been really helpful in learning to navigate this city.  Of course, google maps has been a godsend in helping me walk the town, but there are many other useful apps, a few of which I have listed below:

• FOR YOUR SUBWAY NEEDS-  Hopstop.  It tells you how to get to the nearest sub station and which train to take to get to your desired destination. It also tells you your eta, including walking time.  Beware, though.  This is only an estimate.  And since it's always good to have a back-up app for such things, there's also Embark NYC.  Embark has a better alert system in case of changes to service, but I personally prefer Hopstop.

• FOR YOUR THEATRE TICKET NEEDS-  TKTS.  This app connects to the ticket booths around town (there are three) that can get you discounts to Broadway and Off-Broadway shows.  They are usually (although not always) 50% off.  But be warned, the discount is off the best seats available.  SO if tickets are $160, you will pay around 80, with a service fee.  Which is still a good deal, but if you are looking for nosebleed seats, they are not here.  There's also Today Tix , which offers more seating options and lists the lowest priced tickets available as well as some better seats for a slighter hefty price.  

• FOR YOUR FOOD DELIVERY NEEDS-  Because this is New York, tons of restaurants offer free delivery, and of course there are a couple of apps that will tell you what's in the area (you can also search for specifics) and allow you to place and pay for your order through the app.  You can also see reviews and ratings for suggestions.  I've not used either of these, but both Grub Hub and Seamless come highly recommended.  

Of course they have apps for taking taxis, and there's always Uber.  I used Uber a few times in Austin, as it's very quick with pick-ups and the drivers have always been really friendly.  Truthfully though, , I haven't had any troubles getting a taxi in New York when I needed it, so thus far, I've not used it since moving.

This is just the beginning of my list, which is sure to grow as I meet new people, get suggestions and discover things on my own.  If you have one to add to the list, or suggestions of better apps for the situations mentioned, I would love to hear about it/them in the comments section!

Too Many Rats

Another undeniable feature of New York City?  Rats.  Sightings in the subway are all too common, and as I walked home through the streets of Brooklyn after having a drink with friends, passing by the mounds of garbage at the curbs, a rat scrambled from the garbage bags and crossed my path, which was a first for me.

Truthfully?  I can deal.  I don't want to see one in my apartment EVAH, and every time I make my way to the toady I try not to think of the Urban legend of rats crawling through the pipes and up out of the toilet.  But I think they are here to stay.

This whole situation reminds me of the children's book my Aunt Lu used to read to me before I fell asleep.  It was called The King, The Mice, and The Cheese.  You think New York has rats and mice?

Well, the wise men of the city told the King to get rid of the mice with cats, but shocker, the cats proved to be a bigger problem than the mice so they had to use dogs, and then lions to get rid of the dogs, and elephants to get rid of the lions... you see where this is going, right?

Mice for the win!!!

So, again, as long as they aren't inside with me, cuddled up in bed expecting a belly rub, I will be fine.  Not happy, by any means, but I suppose I will live.  And yet, being "fine" means some days you will walk past a building with a sign like this...

Opening Night at NYMF

Yesterday I was lucky enough to see the opening night of this year's New York Musical Theatre Festival (aka NYMF), and I learned a valuable lesson about traveling in New York-- ALWAYS give yourself more time than you think you will need.  Especially if you are staying out in Brooklyn.  Those "arrival times" on the subway apps are just estimates, people. and they are no guaranty that you will get there at the time they say.

I was meeting my friend at 480 Broadway at 6:30.  Leaving at 5:35 should be enough time to get there, right?  Fuck that!!!  I needn't have spent the time showering and making myself presentable, because after racing 3 blocks to the subway, getting on the 3 and then switching to the express (only to realize that the express landed me a little farther away from Times Square than the local) taking shuttle to Times Square and then walk-running from 42nd to 10th street, I was drenched and red faced (at least that's how I felt).  And I could not find 480 for the life of me.  I found 470... and 500... back to 470...and 500.  I called my friend at 6:56 for a 7pm show.  Would that I was calm cool and collected when making this call.  Alas, I was not.

"I'm going home.  I don't...I don't even know where I am.  I'm at the CVS at 10th and Broadway"

"Joe, the theatre is at 10th and Broadway.  You can make it."

This was my first encounter with inner demons.  Of course, these were relatively small demons, and not giant hairy demons with spiked backs coming at me with great swords.  They were small demons like the little caped chap on the deviled ham cans, with tiny little shrimp forks to jab insistently until I felt I just might lose my shit in frustration at subways and geography and my perceived ineptitude.   I did not lose my shit.  I took a breath, or two.

This is when I realized that though the sign on the outside of the building might say 470, it is ALSO 480, but 480 is upstairs.

I hurried up the stairs, made my way through the velvet rope, passing directly by Johnny Tartaglia, the director, who was far too immersed in pre-show prep to notice the harried homo heading into the theatre.  I met my friend, and a couple of new people who could not have been sweeter, and the A/C started to calm my nerves and soothe my soul.

I hadn't even had a chance to investigate what the show was about.  I'd just seen the blurb of text that mentioned a "super" guy.  Super Hero musical?  Ok.  Could be fun.

What it actually is, as was beautifully captured in the opening number, is a musical about the inner lives of video game characters, specifically those in "Claudio Quest" (an homage to Mario World).   It's the story of two brothers, one a shining star always saving the day, and the other his dutiful and dear, one man pit crew.  It's whimsical, bright, beautifully designed, and very tight.  And while it's clever, it is more than that.  The writers did some major research and tapped into all the things that annoy and inspire us about them, and use the world of Claudio and Luis and Princess Poinsettia to explore questions of free will, the possibilities of defying expectations, and the yearning for something more.  The script is well structured, and supported by some wonderful performances.  There were a few times I thought about the trust that the writers place on the actors, because many lines in less capable hands could land rather flatly, but they are executed with full out commitment and just a smidgeon of irony which helps them really breathe.  Special props to Michael Schupbach and The Puppet Kitchen for the rendering of the angry mushrooms, eggplants and assorted creatures that populate Claudio's Kingdom.

I got to meet John Tartaglia after the show, and he could not have been more charming or considerate.  It was fun to be able to see everyone after, to get to tell them what a wonderful job they'd done,  and what joy they had brought.

If you are in the New York area you have seven more chances to catch this production in its current form, and I couldn't recommend it more.

Me Time

Remember that last post when I mentioned I'd been aching for some "me time"?  That little saying "be careful what you wish for" seems appropriate at this point.  It hit me on day two of being in the apartment (which is perfectly serviceable, but on the older side, complete with pock marked walls and creaking stairs) that every close friend I have in New York, save one, is currently out of town on some amazing adventure.  So I've been doing what I could solo... doing laundry, learning how to get around town, grocery shopping at the bodegas, and eating several meals alone.  It's been nothing but quality "ME Time" for the past three days and it's somehow different being alone when the place you are in is so familiar and friendly.  When everything is new and you are on your own, it can get daunting.

Thankfully, my friends and family have been immensely supportive and reminded me that as of this evening I have only been in New York for a week, and adjustment takes time.

I have been able to push through, though and not succumb completely to laziness (although I am a little ashamed to admit I purchased Outlander from Amazon Prime thanks to a gift card I received and have been devouring it like that rat Templeton from Charlotte's Web when he's let loose at the fair) and have been achieving at least one or two things a day.

I've updated my resumes (acting and survival jobs), sent inquiries to a company I have a connection with that may be hiring in the area, joined a group that offers discounted theatre tickets, and as of ten minutes ago I overcame my nerves and submitted my pic and res for a couple of Equity audition opportunities.  It's a good reminder that the lulls and doldrums will pop up, to be forgiving of myself, and to work through them when possible.

Tonight I went to the opening night of NYMF and saw Claudio Quest!  More on that tomorrow...

My First Two Days in New York City!

My first couple of days in "The Big Apple!!!" (PS: nobody here calls it that, says the person who's lived here for a total of four days and has in no way earned the right to be bitchy about the phrase "The BIG APPLE!!!) were a whirlwind of activity and adjustment.

I went straight from the airport to Queens, where I stayed with my friend Leslie and her husband (also my friend) Paul for the first couple of days.  Leslie is 1 part Tinkerbell, 1 part Gracie Allen (look her up), 1 part Robin Williams.  Times with her are whimsical and carefree, and if you aren't careful--- highly caloric.  I indulged in a couple things, but said "no" to a few others, so I ended up somewhere in the middle.  And what, with all this New York walking...

Some of the things we did:

• Juniors.   It's a deli with locations in Times Square and Brooklyn.  It's famous for it's cheesecake, and has DIVOONDEBAR potato pancakes.  My gawd.  A little sour cream, a little apple sauce...heaven! I've now been there four times, and should start branching out.  But what can I say?  I find something that works and I stick with it.  I had a cup of the matzoh ball soup, some pickles, and a Diet Coke, in case you wondered

• We went to the Actor's Equity Office and I got my Equity Card, which was a major step, and if you are in New York and want to audition for the good stuff, it is a must.  It's usually easier to get outside of NYC, so if you are a performer heading here, I would recommend making that a goal before you get here.  I got the card on first arrival because I had discovered two weeks ago that "Joe Hartman" was currently up for grabs as an Equity name, and for constancy sake, I wanted my SAG and Equity name to remain the same.

• We saw Iris, which I'd been dying to see.  It's the final film of Albert Maysles, part of the team that brought you the gay classic Grey Gardens.  His most recent doc features Iris Apfel, an "octogenarian starlet" who rose to fame in about the past ten years for her massive collection of jewels and fashions, and for her ingenious and audacious ways of displaying them.  She's a beacon for any young artist or individual today, as well as those who may have thought they'd aged out of...well, anything.

Of course, the audience at 2pm on a Thursday was mostly an older crowd, and a reminder that many times in New York, the audience is as entertaining as the film.  Right before it started a gentleman took a phone call (on speaker phone no less) in which he discusses the US Open with some unsuspecting soul for about 6 or seven minutes, blatantly ignoring all the people around him who were "not having it".  They sighed audibly, shouting "turn off your phone!" and such, as I tried to hide my delight.  Quick Quiz!!:  Do you think this man ended the call when the previews started?  Answer:  Hell no!  He kept right on going.  Finally the manager of the theatre came rushing in, arms waving, and gave him the stink eye.  The older gent casually finished his call and apologized. 

Cut to after the film.  An older man in the first couple of rows had fallen asleep, and we gently woke him.  It so startled him he gave  little shout, and his eyes momentarily increased three times in size.  He was thankful we'd awoken him, and so dear.  He just lit up talking about the film and how he'd loved it so much the first time he had to come back and see it again.

•   We went to the dollar store for some remarkable savings...

• We checked out The Museum of the Moving Image for "free" night, and saw the Mad Men exhibit.  It was wonderful!!  They have a recreation of the writers room, sets from the show that were moved and reassembled, and many costumes, as well as the inspiration boards that were created for each character using vintage images.   

• We watched I Am Big Bird (about Sesame Street puppeteer Caroll Spinney) on streaming as we ate egg salad sandwiches.  It was another really inspiring piece about following your own dreams, in spite of what others might, and definitely will say.  

Needless to say, after that much excitement I was ready to have some relaxing me time, and the past couple of days have been devoted to adjusting to my new home for the next three weeks, unpacking, and arranging things to make them feel like mine.  I've also done a shit ton of walking, and naturally getting lost.  Not much, I haven't wandered for hours, but a walk that should normally take ten minutes might take me twenty, as I home in on my destination like a very uncoordinated bat, bumping around in the streets until I finally make it to where I intended to go.  After a week or two in New York I should develop some grade A legs, if God is at all sympathetic.

Too Darn Hot

I've learned a few things in the brief time I've spent in New York City.  First and foremost, I have learned the difference between summer in Austin, Texas, and summer in NYC.

In Austin, yes, it is hot.  Much hotter than here.  90-100 degrees many days, and with the humidity it can seem like more.  But there is one thing that Austin has, that New York does not... an all consuming obsession with air conditioning.  It's deeply embedding in our psyches.  We keep our homes perfectly air conditioned with our central A/C.  We drive to and from work in portable A/Cs.  We carry sweaters to the office to drape on our shoulders for god sake, because the office is always cold, if not downright frigid.  Movie theaters, grocery stores, malls, all these places are pumped full of frigid air.  It's so cool that I have yearned for days I've only seen in films, back in the forties, when  young women and men lounged languidly on wicker chairs on their screened in porches as they sipped lemonade in front of a fan, reading the Sunday comics.  "Oh well" I would think to myself with slight regret, "those days are gone.

No.  Actually they are not.


Here in New York, sure...places are cooled.  And yet... I've walked a great deal here, in the heat, back and forth, around blocks, up and down the stairs.  And the subway?  Certainly not freezing.  Nor is central air conditioning something one can count on in every apartment here. Most of the time they will have the window units, if they have A/C at all.  My home for the first couple of nights?  Window unit.  My home for the next three weeks?  No A/C at all.  Cue the forties music as I start squeezing the lemons.

It actually reminds me a lot of when I was a kid, around four, and my mother and I were staying in the  upstairs bedroom of my aunt and uncle while we looked for a more permanent place to stay.  Mom and I would lie with the lights out, window open, fan blowing, as we played some children's record and I fell asleep listening to "The Little White Duck", and "The Teddy Bear's Picnic".  At the time I didn't think too much of it.  It was so hot my arms stuck to whatever part of my body they lay upon.  Of course now, those are good times.  Golden even.  And just hearing "Mares Eat Oats and Does Eat Oats" gives me a glow.

So here's hoping that as I lie on top of the sheets with fans blowing, that I am making fond memories of my early days in New York.